Posted on by nikita

The Dimaagi Naxals

row of soldiers with weapons

Disclaimer: I am a proud Indian, and I am not a ‘Dimaagi Naxal’.

In his address on the 80th Independence Day of India, the Prime Minister used the term dimaagi naxal, presumably referring to those intellectual minds and forces that work against the holistic growth of India. And obviously, as expected, repercussions followed. In no time, many across India fell into his rhetorical trap. Koi shak!

A Gujju at heart, we are told farti topi pehri nai levani, which figuratively means don’t let anyone trick you. Nevertheless, without naming anyone, many were tricked by the Gujju PM, and we had senior leaders like P. Chidambaram who proudly claimed to be a dimaagi naxal. 

Most of us know that Naxalism refers to a militant Maoist movement in India that advocates armed struggle to overthrow the state and establish a communist order. I am sure Mr Chidambaram is also well versed with its definition; after all, he served as the Home Minister of India when naxalites still existed in India.

And it’s not just him. Many politicians and non-supporters of the government had their own interpretations, eventually leading to political mudslinging. 

While everyone was pointing at the outside traitor, my mind immediately identified a traitor within my body—the rebellious hormones. 

Based on my research, in a woman’s body, hormones like estrogen, progesterone, testosterone, and many more work for years in harmony with her body, only to seemingly rebel against it as she ages, snailing towards perimenopause and menopause. 

These insurgent hormones start disrupting the body that seems to control them. They fluctuate within her, sometimes drastically, leading to severe anxiety and irritability, much like many in Gen Z. While they are, for obvious reasons, worried about their futures and irritated by the local and global upheaval, many women get irked by something as mundane as thinking about what to prepare for lunch or dinner. 

And I wonder, how come men don’t face such a backlash during andropause? Why don’t they have similar ‘pauses’ in their lives like women after a certain age? 

Disturbed by one more example of inequality, I did some research. Research says many men don’t even realize that their hormones—many of them the same as women’s—interfere in their everyday life. That’s because their hormones vary in amounts and patterns. Their irritation, anger, mood swings, and other symptoms are more about lifestyle than hormones.  

Once I was enlightened, the dimaagi naxal (the result of my fluctuating hormones) within me was struck with an idea. Right now in our country, protests are the new normal, popping up like mushrooms. Why not the women of India rise to a new protest, demanding equality of physical and mental pain for men?

Laughable, of course.

The idea was immediately followed by the realization that such a protest might not gain traction across India. But women can do one thing for sure—begin with creating awareness about male menopause and its symptoms akin to sowing a seed. Scare them with some medical jargon. Hyper-aware them. Podcasts after podcasts on male menopause or late-onset hypogonadism, making them more anxious. Let normal ageing signs worry them. Make them feel that they are victims of some unique changes in their body, thereby putting men and women on an equal pedestal. Dimaagi naxal, of course, because of hormones.

If this kind of protest doesn’t work, women can initiate a fifth wave of feminism, taking inspiration from RaGa’s slogan ‘Smash the patriarchy’ that reverberated at the Chhatron Ki Goonj event in Pune. Surprisingly, the event was exclusively for young women! Why wasn’t it considered relevant for young men?  

Those who got an opportunity to speak from the stage voiced their anger against patriarchy, but no one questioned Mr Gandhi, “Sir, why don’t you begin with smashing the patriarchy by supporting a 33% seat quota for women in Parliament?”

We know the dimaagi kidaa of patriarchy cannot be wiped completely from any society, since the conditioning goes back to eras. Today, in the so-called progressive world, patriarchy is like a sloth; it often stays completely still for long periods to conserve energy, waiting for a predatory moment akin to naxal-like guerrilla attacks. They may not always leave visible physical harm, but they do create a mental dent. True for women and men both. 

Even today, many men in Indian society have not been able to smash the patriarchal concept of mard ko kabhi dard nahi hota—an irony in itself for a manly man. It is this mindset that refrains them from exhibiting their vulnerable, feminine qualities, eventually leading to depression and suicides.

According to the latest official data from the National Crime Records Bureau (NCRB) report, 73.5% of men commit suicide across the age spectrum. And the most common recorded reason is family problems. 

It’s okay to be called sissy sometimes, man. We are all born with masculine and feminine qualities. Explore them like women. Smash the patriarchy.

BTW, shouldn’t women bear a grudge against ‘sissy’ being used as an insult for men?

*****

Brother: Who, according to you, is a dimaagi naxal?
Sister: Let’s leave that question for today. It’s Raksha Bandhan.

HAPPY RAKSHA BANDHAN

Posted on by nikita

Protests, Poribortan, and Paltu Rams

As much as I would like to avoid processed food, I can’t be completely off it. Recently, when I went to buy a packet of puffed lemon rice from a nearby general store I frequently visit, the shopkeeper asked me whether I would be willing to change my preference to the new food time introduced by the famous company. He asked me to try a jhalmuri snack instead. 

‘Oh! Jhalmuri! The one Modiji tasted before paltifying the TMC rule in Bengal?’ I confirmed. But I wasn’t ready for a sudden change in my identity — from a Gujarati surti to a Bengali maanus. Poribortan takes time.  

Walking home, I tumbled into the metaphorical rabbit hole of fantastic thoughts. 

First, I came across a group of angry chameleons. They appeared really upset with humankind, especially the recent Paltu Rams in politics — the ones who defected from their political party for paisa, power and position. How willingly would they change their narrative to suit their political career! 

The reptiles were surprised at humankind’s ability to change colours just as naturally as they did, making it difficult for them to classify them as humans.

Unanimously, the chameleons decided to file a defamation case against the ministers, specifically those who defected from their party. They felt that in the name of freedom, these Paltu Rams are maligning their biological and evolutionary identity. So, the famous chameleon Trumpy, known for its agility to change colours, shouted, Are you with me or with me?, and the sound of cheerful ‘Yay’ reverberated in the hole. 

When I fell deeper into the hole, I saw a small group of cockroaches. They had also gathered for some sort of protest. Eavesdropping on some conversations made me realise that they were discussing India’s current education system. A genuine concern, though. A much-needed poriborton after the NEET paper leak and CBSE controversy.

Suddenly, there was a loud announcement by their leader, who stood on a mound and called himself Tipke. Oh! The same cockroach guy who claimed to have a million followers. But I was surprised to see that only a small percentage of them had turned up for the protest. 

Tipke began with his address to his fellow cockroaches gathered there. ‘Friends, Indians, Gen Z, we demand educational reforms and accountability from our government.’

Mm-hmm.

I could see many cockroaches swiftly running here and there as if they weren’t even aware of what was being said. They seemed unaware of the agenda. Not a fan or follower of cockroaches, I decided to interview a few of them.

One of the youth members told me he was there to demand the resignation of Amit Pradhan, the Minister of Education.

Huh! Amit Pradhan? 

The other cockroach, flaunting his black coat (he said he had come directly from the High Court), told me his bhai, standing next to him in a black coat, would answer the question since he wasn’t aware of the issue at hand. 

Woowww!!! 

Like an enthusiastic young Indian, I approached a group of Gen Z, probably discussing something important. On questioning, one of them belligerently complained about the hacking of EVM machines by the current government in particular states. And the best part was that he even prophesied about the hacking that would happen in Kerala and Tamil Nadu in the next election. 

Uhhm!! 

Finally, I went to a baby cockroach and inquired about the reason for her attending the meeting. Confused, with a fluttering voice, she said she was there to ask the government to stop the war between America and Israel. 

Whaaaattt?? 

Baffled by such responses and the engulfing darkness, I opened the door at the other side of the hole and entered my house. Finally, it was all light and radiant. 

*****

Friend: Be the change you wish to …
Me: Ahha!

Posted on by nikita

Upcycling Recycling Downcycling
         

Suddenly the concept of upcycling has come to the forefront. Reels on upcycling your mom’s saree, your dupatta, or a pair of denim are on the surge. A wonderful idea but not at all new.

Upcycling is a unique concept if one thinks from the point of view of sustainability in clothing. Less dumping, fewer landfills. Indeed, upcycling provides an opportunity to see the same saree or dupatta in a different light. A better light. Philosophical ha!

I still remember transforming my mom’s jamevaram and pethani sarees, and even my embroidered dupattas, into beautiful dresses. I do it even today. It allows me to explore and expand my creative realm.

Back then, we didn’t use the technical term ‘upcycling’. That’s the only difference. And  neither social media was available to make the concept popular.

Like we didn’t use the psychological or medical terms like ‘anxiety’ and ‘depression’. Most of us must have experienced emotions like fear, anger, sadness, restlessness, shame, nervousness, and many more that drained our happiness from within, like a lamprey fish that feeds off its prey and sucks its life. Either such emotions were considered natural while growing up or for most of us they weren’t worth an intervention. Maybe, we never realized how these emotions would shape an individual if unchecked and unattended.

Like we hardly realize (or we pretend not to realize) that the constant flood of motivational thoughts and beliefs in the modern era are nothing but the ‘recycled’ thoughts and beliefs of ancient wisdom. Of ancient philosophers and thinkers. It’s just that these learnings have become more accessible and fascinating because of technology and the way they are presented. Or represented?

I’m not sure if any learning is happening though.

But, surely, Ms. Atishi has learned the art of being a politician. In a press conference, before taking oath as the Chief Minister of Delhi, she analogized her situation with Bharat, the younger brother of Shri Ram. Akin to Bharat, in the epic The Ramayana, who had declared not to occupy the throne of Ayodhya since he considered Ram as the rightful heir, she announced that the Chief Minister’s seat would be occupied only by her brother Mr. Kejriwal. She was seen sitting in a chair next to Mr. Kejriwal’s throne-like red-coloured chair in the office with pictures of Bhagat Singh and Babasaheb Ambedkar on the wall in the background.

No sooner did this self-proclaimed-morally-superior analogy leave the premises of her mouth than there was an uproar on every news channel. Ms. Atishi had cleverly employed an ancient thought in the modern context, considering herself and Mr. Kejriwal to be the Bharat and the Ram respectively of the kalyug. Of course, she couldn’t replicate the part where Bharat placed Ram’s padukas on the throne. Mr. Kejriwal might be having only one pair of  footwear since he is an Aam aadmi. 

Wondering if the comparison is even fitting in the first place! Instead, isn’t it ‘downcycling’ a religious event?

Ram gave up his claim to kingship when he was exiled for 14 years. Shouldn’t Mr. Kejriwal have relinquished his chief ministership when he was jailed for around 6 months, setting the right example for future political leaders, especially if he aimed to emulate the principles of Ram? Also, are the citizens of Delhi eagerly awaiting Mr. Kejriwal’s return to power, just as the people of Ayodhya awaited Ram?

Difficult to say. India’s 2024 general elections  resulted in a surprising paradigm shift. So, let’s wait for February 2025.

*****

Me: Give me another word for ‘religious doctrines’.
Friend: Chinese whispers.

Posted on by nikita

Calls, Covers, Celebration and Commotion

Rakshabandhan is around the corner and we can already smell excitement in the otherwise drowsy atmosphere. The shoppers appear more attentive in following the city’s green, red, yellow, and orange traffic lights rather than the colour-coded alerts that didn’t actualize as cautioned by the Indian Meteorological Department (IMD). Instead of raining cats and dogs as predicted by the IMD, only to be proven predictably wrong, it’s raining sales and discounts everywhere.

However, not everybody would be thrilled about the approaching festival. Some see the rakhi celebration as just another family gathering, and I don’t completely disagree. At the same time, that’s what festivals like Rakshabandhan, Diwali, Utarayan, and many more Indian festivals have evolved into — a family feast.

And today when joint families are becoming less common, such festivals could be considered a need of the hour even if one sees a family member only on special occasions, once or twice a year.

In fact, such a celebratory moment could be used as a springboard to start a conversation with this one-time-in-the-year-meeting brother or sister. To catch up with some of the latest titbits of each other’s lives.

I agree that more often than not there’s more commotion than communication during such gatherings, but that’s what life is all about—without chaos, can we understand calm?

And your peace is tested in every imaginable way — from selecting rakhis and gifts to finalizing the menu for the celebration. The prepping up for the celebration is more interesting than merely the day of celebration.

It begins with making calls by the ladies in the family to mama ki beti or bua ki beti or chacha ki beti or mausi ki beti, or a couple of these betiya, or all of them when there’s a Suraj Barjatia movie-type family. And then there are 3rd generation betiya also for whom calls are made. There’s a complete checklist of names the mother or the wife needs to keep a tab on so that none of them is missed.

Thinking out loud — why is it that the woman of the house (in most cases) has to make calls? Is there any such clause in the Constitution of Patriarchy that feminists should be directed to?

Or possibly, such a work of responsibility is awarded to women since they are the ones who score higher than men in areas of interpersonal relationships and social responsibility? Someone who understands how to bind families together. There are exceptions, of course.

Once you (the sister) have received the calls and checked the box next to each brother’s name, the scavenger hunt begins. You dash from one shop to another, looking for the right and affordable gifts for your brothers. (You generally have a budget to follow unless the Ambani(s) is the limit). Because there will be some who love chocolates, some who love mithai, some who prefer sugar-free cookies, and some who are under an oath to not have any mithai, chocolates, or cookies for a certain period.

Buying thoughtful gifts for your brothers can be daunting, but it’s fun too. Of course, brothers also make a humongous effort to prepare envelopes, also called covers (which again are generally bought by the woman of the house) for their sisters, considering the creeping inflation. Hopefully! 🙂

The covers remind me of the generation-old practice of maintaining a book to record the money given and received during festivals and marriages. Have you come across a 100-page hardcover notebook in your mother’s almirah, where they made a note of who gave what and when?

Preparing covers for numerous sisters is not as simple as Mr. Gandhi’s remark about ‘budget ka halwa’ might sound. Like the ‘halwa ceremony’, marking the final stage of the Budget, brothers decide on a budget a few days before Rakshabandhan — a traditional practice of deciding whom to give how much. Your bond with your brothers could be one of the criteria for the amount you would receive in a closed envelope. A deciding factor.

Might not be true for every individual. Because not everyone believes in following their parents’ age-old footsteps. Just as smartphones become smarter with each new update, brothers are becoming smarter by the day. They understand that, with time, the value of money has changed and so should the weight of the covers. (Some hint, just in case…:)

And finally, there’s D-Day. Happy celebration and happy commotion. Colourful rakhis, kumkum, fancy covers and gifts, and family lunch or dinner.

*****

A quick reality check:
Are we celebrating the bond between a brother and a sister for the sake of it? One more example of conditioning since we’ve been tying rakhi from a very young age? Is it perfunctory? Or are genuine emotions of love and care at play on both sides?

*****

Brother: What do you want for this Rakshabandhan?
Sister: Acknowledgement.

Source of the image – https://cdn.siasat.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/08/images-11.jpeg

Posted on by nikita

Sacred Saffron: The smell, the sight, the scare.

“Kesar joiye che biju?” 

The word kesar immediately conjured up images of kesari dhwaja everywhere in the city. Coincidentally, I was preparing mithai on 22nd January 2024. And my mom had called me to ask if I needed more saffron for my mithai preparation. 

January 2024 was the month of saffron. Saffron was omnipresent. And now, it seems, it is omnipotent too. The demand for saffron flags had skyrocketed, generating earning opportunities for the seasonal hawkers. Suddenly, roadside hawkers, who make a cameo appearance before the 15th of August, 26th of January, and 25th of December, selling miniature Indian national flags and Christmas caps, showed up out of thin air even this time. There was a surge in saffron flags and banners of varied sizes with the image of the deity, His devotee, and His controversial abode. Huge saffron banners covering the length of high-rise buildings were also put up to remind people of their culture and religion. 

Is it just the colour people need to remember, or even the associated conduct? 

I completely respect people’s love for their religion. After all, India is known for its varied range of religions. But what confuses me is the frenzy attached to religion. And for that matter any religion. As the date of consecration ceremony was approaching near, I felt more apprehensive.

What if such a show of a particular religious belief led to some unforeseen disorder and disturbance?

And then, the next month was the month of red. Suddenly, we see a sea of red across the city. A display of red clothing and lingerie in shop-fronts. Gift shops display paraphernalia related to Valentine’s Day – all lovely reds. I am not sure if even today this day is celebrated with the same fervour as in the days of Archie’s card. I remember seeing huge cards in gift shops with poetic messages for loved ones: even red and pink teddy bears and soft heart-shaped cushions. I was blessed enough to see them, but not enough to receive any.

With time, the idea of cards and gifts seems to have changed just as the understanding of the meaning of valentine. During my time, the celebration was limited between lovers: a boy and a girl; a husband and a wife. Oh! The romantic charm of yesteryear’s tokens! Today, not many people would want to make an effort to go out and shop for their loved ones. BTW, love is not just a feeling; it’s an effort. Now gift items like flowers, chocolates, jewellery, and so on are just a click and a doorbell away. So, no more the moral Sang(h) and Rang to worry about. No more worries about saff-run (to your houses). Love is still in the air. 

You must be thinking why am I celebrating vasi uttarayan now? Because even today when I sit back and think about these events, I ponder – Do we need religious tokens in excess to establish our religiosity? Do we need to make a show of it? Do we need ostentatious religious rituals to prove that we are religious? And nationalists as well? 

*****

Of course, we do need tokens of love. Even if hearts fly across the screen.

Friend: Maryada Purushottam Ram is a vyavahar (demeanour).
Me: Agreed. It’s not a vyapar (business).